Elly ([info]chan_chan) wrote,
@ 2006-08-16 23:12:00
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Current location:Home
Current mood: depressed

Tv Drama.
I put Shannon on a plane this morning. And it was probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. I don't feel good about it. Or happy. In fact I feel a thousand other things, pain, nausea, depression, need, selfishness.

I spent the day at my parents, when I got back there after dropping him off at the airport I was in such a state I asked my mom for stuff to knock me out. I had a raging headache, and my stomach beside the feeling that I was going to puke also was hurting. I'm glad I did, the 6 hours of sleep I got really cleared my head a bit, and I wasn't such a basket case afterwards.

I'm not saying I'm Ok. Because that is so far from the truth its not funny. I'm hurting, and I know that I'll see him again, and that things will eventually be ok, but right now i cant seem to look that sunny future, and all i see is the fact that I'm once again alone.

He's only been gone a few hours and I was almost Ok till I got home, and I walked in the computer room and his lappy wasn't there, and I started to cry again. His empty desk and Empty chair haunt me more then I ever wanted it to.

I miss you...




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[info]mneylu
2006-08-17 02:39 am UTC (link)
:(

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[info]mneylu
2006-08-17 02:43 am UTC (link)
I can't even imagine how you are feeling right now- not even an inkling. Reading your words right here and now made my heart flip over feeling for you, but I know that what I am feeling is nowhere near you. I am so sorry this had to happen... Although I am very happy that what did happen, before the bad news, did happen. Whatever you choose to do, I am behind you 100 percent... stuff like this happens once in a blue moon....

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[info]chrysus
2006-08-18 04:36 am UTC (link)
Amiessss what happened? I havent chatted with you guys in a while, lets catch up on aim!

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